The Thief, the Sucker & the Chicken

Former Soviet Union KGB thug, and current Russian leader, Vladimir Putin, managed to distinguish himself as a typical criminal parasitical politician when he brazenly robbed New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft, in person and in broad daylight, of his $25,000 personalized 4.94-carat diamond-encrusted Super Bowl ring, then calmly walked away surrounded by his entourage of KGB goons.

It was during a 2005 meeting with the thief in Saint Petersburg Russia when Putin became enamored with the ring. As Kraft, the sucker remembers it: "I took out the ring and showed it to [him], and he put it on and he goes, ‘I can kill someone with this ring.’ I put my hand out and he put it in his pocket, and three KGB guys got around him and walked out."

So Putin, the thief, stole Kraft, the sucker’s, super bowl ring.

That’s what suckers get for hobnobbing with criminals.

Then, adding insult to injury, after returning to the states and demanding his ring back, President Obama, the chicken, at the behest of the American government, actually instructed Kraft, the sucker, to just chalk his loss up as a gift so as not to offend the thief and perhaps strain diplomatic relations with the Russian government.  

“It would really be in the best interest of US-Soviet relations if you meant to give the ring as a present,” the chicken advised the sucker. 

Thereafter, the sucker dutifully obeyed the chicken telling people all these years that he gave his super bowl ring to the thief as a gift, and it is still reportedly in the possession of the Russian people in the Kremlin library.

So Obama, the chicken, afraid of Putin, the thief, told Kraft, the sucker, to sacrifice his valuable property for the government good.

That’s what suckers get for hobnobbing with criminals.

And that’s the true story of the thief, the sucker and the chicken.